This might be the hardest thing that I’ll ever write. Wife of 10 years just told me that she is pregnant (11 weeks) as a result of a drunken night out with friends. She met somebody in the bar, had sex, doesn’t even remember his name. She had known for 3 weeks and was considering aborting but couldn’t go through with it without telling me. She wants to abort so we can move on with our lives. She is sorry and wants to make it work.
I’m not sure what to do. We have a 10 year old together so divorce is not that easy. I trust that she is sorry and this was a one time mistake. I don’t know how to process it all just yet, how to forgive, how to move on but another life is involved now. I know I can raise the kid as my own but it will come with a lot of compromises, and she is afraid that it will be harder to mend with a reminder in front of us all our lives. There are 100 reasons to not go through with it. Financial reasons. Other guy was different race so chances are that the baby would look different than us otherwise we wouldn’t even tell anybody that it wasnt ours. Other guy might come back in our lives ( very very remote possibility) and might want to share custody. This will certainly complicate our lives like any unplanned pregnancy probably does.
There is a 1 very good reason to keep it - keep an innocent life alive and I know I’m capable of providing a loving environment. Our 10 year old was born after 5 miscarriages so it’s a miracle that this is growing and healthy at 11 weeks. Our 10 year old will have a sibling. Wife thinks we should abort and try on our own if that’s what I want but it just feels wrong to erase a life and create another like its no big deal.
Not sure what to do..
Sad and lost husband and father…